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How To Deal With Toxic Bosses

How To Deal With Toxic Bosses

September 18, 2020 / Gabby Coles

How do you feel when you walk into work?

Do you feel like you've just entered a jungle, and with one misstep, your boss will swoop down and attack? Does your stomach drop at just the thought of interacting with your boss? Are you constantly tense, prepped for a verbal lashing at any moment?

If you've ever worked for a bully, then you know exactly what I'm talking about. Even if you haven't yet, you definitely will at least once in their life; Power does corrupt, after all. Toxic bosses are an epidemic, especially in the United States. A 2017 survey found that 61% of American employees are aware of managers abusing employees while at work. 65% of bullied employees flat out quit their jobs to end the torment. In fact, the number one reason people leave their jobs is because of horrible bosses.

You're Not Alone

Unfortunately, quitting a job and losing pay is not a realistic or safe solution for many. We need to pay our bills, eat, have access to healthcare, and support our families. And even if a work environment is hostile and unhealthy, we still rely on our jobs to survive.

So, know that you're not alone in your suffering with a toxic boss. More importantly - know that there are healthy ways to deal with toxic bosses when it is necessary to keep your job. Many suffer physically and mentally under their toxic boss, experiencing depression and anxiety due to the daily humiliation, intimidation, and threats they suffer from superiors. But, we're here to help you stay sane and make hopefully make your job more bearable. Here are ways to deal with toxic bosses.

Focus On Your Job

In a perfect world, your toxic boss would one day apologize to you and your coworkers for their abusive ways, and make a complete 180 in how they treat you. However, your toxic boss is not likely to change their behavior overnight. Instead, you can do the next best thing and change how you behave.

Bullies thrive on the attention and reactions you give them. Instead of focusing on your boss and what they may do, focus on your job and the tasks you can control. Focus your energy on your performance and work results. After all - your boss doesn't care about how you feel, but they probably do care about your productivity and the results you deliver that make them look good. Yes, your high-quality work may be giving them a boost they don't deserve, but it also gives others a reason to notice your skill and your boss one less reason to scold you.

On the flip side to this - do not overwork yourself. When your work hours are over, they are over. Unplug and distance yourself from your job after hours and on weekends, and invest your time in self-care.

Use Body Language As a Defense

Before we had words, we had body language. Even if we're not consciously aware, our bodies automatically take on postures and movements that indicate how we are mentally feeling about a situation. In turn, people unconsciously those subtleties.

Be mindful of your posture when your boss confronts you. A bully feels empowered when they see you cower or slouch in their presence. When you interact with your toxic boss, focus on lifting your chest and chin to communicate that you are ready to talk and not be intimidated by them. Having a better posture will give off a more definite vibe, and your boss may not feel as inclined to act aggressively. Remember - your words can be quoted and held against, but body language cannot.

Understand The Bully

We've been hearing this advice since grammar school. But what we've been hearing about bullies is true - they are nothing more than selfish and immature people. They act like poorly behaved children, except, this big child that we're talking about happens to have a lot of control over your quality of life.

While you can't put your toxic boss in time out, you can track and take notes on their behavior. Take detailed notes of dates, times, and conversations you have with your boss. Reconfirm and reiterate every assignment, suggestion, meeting, and task via e-mail, so that you have a written record. Having evidence of what your boss tells you makes it hard for them to turn on you later. If they target you, but you know the facts are otherwise, politely send them your notes as a gentle reminder of what was said. The detailed logs can also be used for your defense later on if Human Resources or others ever get involved.

Believe In Yourself and Get Out

Despite how incompetent, stupid, lazy, and worthless your toxic boss makes you feel - know that you are not. In abusive relationships, it is common for the abused to believe that they deserve to be treated poorly. However, that is not true. You deserve to be treated with respect.

Remember, you were hired into your position for a reason. Your employer believes in your education and skills to choose you for your role over other people they interviewed.

Know your worth, and know that there are better jobs out there that you are an excellent fit for. Leaving your job and your toxic boss is not a sign of failure - it's you making a beneficial decision for your health and survival. Letting your boss ruin your self-confidence and affect your performance can make it challenging to apply to other jobs. That's why it is so important to focus on your tasks and your health - give yourself the chance to apply to other jobs successfully and get away from your toxic boss sooner than later.

We hope these tips will help you cope with a toxic work environment. Be sure to check out our new articles published daily and the latest styles on iTouchWearables.com. Also, let us know how you are doing by following us on Instagram @itouchwearables and Facebook @itouchwearables and by dropping a comment and like.

- Gabby

 


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